Published recently in Rats Ass Review Online


my life as a barnacle is ever so sweet;
I can have sex without moving my feet.

sex at a distance is my great strength since
my penis is forty-five times my length.

if I were a man on the fifty-yard line every
girl in sight could potentially be mine.

and even if girls did not wish to mate
I could spermcast my offerings to every gate.

extending my reach well beyond my grasp, making
girls who felt safe in the parking lot gasp.

you think I’d get bored hanging out by the pier
same old tides, same old girls both in front and in rear.

but when I am finished a wonder occurs, cuz’
I grow a new penis, a new set of spurs.

I know all the girls within several feet and
reaching and touching them’s no special feat.

and although myself impregnate I could I
think it highly unlikely I would.

one thing is sad though, I can’t run and play, cuz’
I’m stuck on a rock twenty-four hours a day.

there’s a rock up the beach filled with hundreds
and hundreds and hundreds of other…
I lost my train of thought.

still, what I have’s a small miracle of life, an
existence so simple without major strife.

the tide comes in, the tide goes out, then
I grow a new penis, then

the tide comes in, the tide goes out, then
I grow another new penis, then

shit…there’s that rock up the beach…

Michael Coolen is a pianist, composer, actor, performance artist, and writer living in Oregon. His works have been published in a variety of print and online journals. He is a published composer, with works performed around the world, including at Carnegie Hall, MoMA, and the Christie Gallery in New York.

Michael Coolen: Pianist, Composer, Writer, Performance Artist, Actor, and Stuff

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring  will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time. T.S. Eliot.

Please click on the Audio Link which I think is a musical way to introduce myself below.


                       coolen-websiite  cropped-michaelcoolen.jpg  blue and pink hair  Mike_playing_Xalam-web  Company-photo-of-me-for-web 

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if every time you entered a room or opened up your webpage or gave advice to your children, it would be accompanied by the sound of the introduction of Richard Strauss’ Also Sprach Zarathustra? How about if it sounded the moment you were born?

My website is devoted to sharing my creative efforts, as well as to promote myself as a storyteller, writer, actor, composer, pianist, and performance artist,  To know more about me, click on About Me.

Welcome to my world


Chapter One of my memoir is now available on Amazon Kindle.  Check it out.